Bananas go to law school, too!


I will finance my high standard of living with Jeopardy winnings, not lawyer salary

I just re-looked at the form I have to bring to Jeopardy qualification thingamajggy after finals and I have to think of FIVE FASCINATING FACTS to talk to Alex about. They're like "any kinds of intersting collections or hobbies." Ew, lame. Now, besides the obligatory "Let's see how we can insult Trebeck's mother" ideas, I need some goodies. Here is my list, so far. It's pretty much as successful as FINALS. HA!

1. I have a hole in my heart. My venticles kinda slosh my blood around, which makes my heart more like an amphibian's heart than a human heart. Twinnie likens it to having a BABOON HEART, but that's just crazy, it's a FROG heart. Get it straight, jeez.

2. I speak Polish, Italian and Spanish. And I'm going to try the perilous adventure of non-alphabet languages and teaching myself Mandarin this summer. OR AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT IT SAYS ON MY RESUME.

3. My father once tried to pawn us off as "under 12" at Niagra Falls when we were going into our sophomore year in high school. And I was 5'7. Somehow, the cheap man gets away with this, but they give us the child size ponchos. So while everyone else there had navy blue ponchos that went to mid-thigh, Twinnie and I had to join the 5 years olds with the bright yellow ponchos that went to our waists, not even half way down our arms and were tight. Please see point number 1 for a complex that might have stemmed from this fiasco.

So, seriously, unless it consists of making fun of my childhood or heart, I have NOTHING. Unless I'm like "Listen, Trebeck, I have a totally awesome blog where I write words on your 'stache." So, obviously, I need to start a collection. And there is no better time for a collection that two weeks before finals. Currently, my collections are as follows:

Empty diet coke bottles I keep telling myself I will recycle
Used highlighters
Post-it note flags that flag nothing in particular