Bananas go to law school, too!



As promised, here is my first list of the soon-to-be-new year. 52 books to read! Law school casebooks not included. These are assorted selections from "Best of" lists from 2005. Might as well catch up on the rest of the world, starting with this past year. Hopefully a good mix of fiction & non-fiction; of course, over the summer I will probably be reading more than one book a week - but I kept the list at 52 so I could indulge in some good, old-fashioned "chick lit" as I've been known to enjoy :) WITHOUT further ado, the list!

1. The Year of Magical Thinking, Joan Didion
2. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, Jonathan Foer
3. Freakonomics, Steven Levitt
4. Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life, Amy Rosenthal
5. Oh the Glory of It All, Sean Wilsey
6. Never Let Me Go, Kazuo Ishiguro
7. The History of Love, Nicole Krauss
8. A Man without a Country, Kurt Vonnegut
9. A Tender Bar, J.R. Moehringer
10. On Beauty, Zadie Smith
11. The Glass Castle, Jeanette Walls
12. 1491, Charles Mann
13. Saturday, Ian McEwan
14. The Historian, Elizabeth Kostova
15. 1776, David McCullough
16. God's Politics, Jim Wallis
17. Lunar Park, Bret Easton Ellis
18. Specimen Days, Michael Cunnigham
19. Teacher Man, Frank McCourt
20. Blink, Malcolm Gladwell
21. Veronica, Mary Gaitskill
22. Six Bad Things, Charlie Huston
23. The Areas of My Expertise, John Hodgman
24. Collapse, Jared Diamond
25. The March, E.L. Doctorow
26. Saving Fish From Drowning, Amy Tan
27. Mother of Sorrows, Richard McCann
28. The Golden Spruce, John Vaillant
29. Eleanor Rigby, Douglas Coupland
30. Prep, Curtis Sittenfeld
31. Becoming Justice Blackmun, Linda Greenhouse
32. Shalimar the Clown, Salman Rushdie
33. Magic for Beginners, Kelly Link
34. American Prometheus, Kai Bird
35. The Assassin's Gate, George Packer
36. Post-War, Tony Judt
37. Tulia, Nate Blakeslee
38. Restless Giant, James T. Patterson
39. The Peabody Sisters, Megan Marshall
40. Radicals in Robes, Cass Sustein
41. I Didn't Do It For You, Michela Wrong
42. Beasts of No Nation, Uzodinma Iweala
43. Epileptic, David B
44. American Desert, Percival Everett
45. The Sea, John Banville
46. A Long Long Way, Sebastian Barry
47. The Testing of Luther Albright, MacKenzie Bezos
48. Johnny Mad Dog, Emmanuel Dongala
49. The Painted Drum, Louise Erdrich
50. Our Ecstatic Days, Steve Erickson
51. No Country for Old Men, Cormac McCarthy
52. The Hummingbird's Daughter, Luis Alberto Urrea

Edit: Replaced a repeat (silly me) with Becoming Justice Blackmun by Linda Greenhouse.

New Year's Eve

Happy New Year!


The Office Pool, 2006

Might as well do something uber-bloggie every now and then. The NYT has an op-ed piece with a set up for you to make predictions for the upcoming year. They say, “In a good year, a master prognosticator gets four right.” Here’s my shot.

1. U.S. troops in Iraq at 2006 year's end will number: (a) current "base line" 138,000; (b) closer to 100,000; (c) closer to 90,000; (d) 80,000 or below.
None of the above. I hate to be Debbie Downer, but I would predict that they increase closer to 145,000/150,000. Here's hoping I'm totally wrong.

2. Speaker of the House succeeding Dennis Hastert will be: (a) Mike Pence; (b) Rahm Emanuel; (c) Steny Hoyer; (d) Roy Blunt; (e) Nancy Pelosi; (f) Tom DeLay.
Mike Pence. Go Indiana :)

3. Best-picture Oscar to: (a) Woody Allen's comeback, "Match Point"; (b) Ang Lee's "Brokeback Mountain"; (c) James Mangold's "Walk the Line" (cashing in on Reese Witherspoon's performance); (d) Niki Caro's antisexist "North Country."
Brokeback Mountain

4. The Robertscalito court will: (a) in the Texas case disengage from involvement in states' redistricting; (b) go the other way in Oregon, holding that federal power to prohibit substances trumps a state's authority to permit physician-assisted suicide; (c) decide that federal funds can be denied to law schools that prohibit military recruitment on campus; (d) uphold McCain-Feingold, enabling Congress to restrict political contributions but not expenditures; (e) reassert citizens' Fourth Amendment protection from "security letters" and warrantless surveillance.
All of the above.

5. Nonfiction sleeper best seller will be: (a) "Never Have Your Dog Stuffed," by Alan Alda; (b) "Self-Made Man" by Norah Vincent, the new Steinem; (c) "In Search of Memory," by Nobelist Eric Kandel.
Vincent's book sounds interesting - but I think I'm in the minority of people who would actually buy the book. So I'd have to go with Eric Kandel.

6. Fiction surprise will be: (a) "Eye Contact" by Cammie McGovern, about an autistic murder witness; (b) "The World to Come" by Dara Horn, about a museum heist; (c) a media murder mystery by Russ Lewis; (d) second novel by Scooter Libby about anything.
The World to Come. Riding on the coattails of The DaVinci Code might be tacky - but the same people who enjoyed The DaVinci Code are not discerning enough to care much about "tackiness." (sorry, "subtle" jam).

7. Israel-Palestine affected by: (a) political split in successful Hamas; (b) Mahmoud Abbas naming jailed Marwan Barghouti his Fatah successor; (c) dieter Arik Sharon's centrist Kadima party winning big in March and forming coalition with Labor.
B & C.

8. Government report most likely to resist investigative reporting will be: (a) special prosecutor David Barrett's 400-page exposé of political influence within the Internal Revenue Service and Clinton Justice Department; (b) the 36-page report by the Senate Intelligence Committee about the 2000 terrorist attack on the destroyer Cole, cleared for release by the C.I.A. but suppressed by the Senate.

9. Stock market will: (a) slump in midsummer, causing data-dependent Fed chief Bernanke to morph into "accommodative Ben"; (b) tread water while a barrel of oil gurgles down to $50 and media "convergence" zigs while corporate "disaggregation" zags; (c) finally reflect sustained 4 percent G.D.P. growth by Dow breaking through 12,000.

10. In Iraqi politics: (a) Shiite majority will refuse to amend the constitution to suit Sunnis; (b) disgruntled Sunnis will encourage terrorists to drive out Americans; (c) nationalist Iraqis and bridging Kurds will achieve a loose confederation and create a Muslim brand of democracy.
A & B. Debbie Downer INDEED!

11. Vote-changing domestic issue in this year's U.S. elections will be: (a) wiretapping and computer intrusions on privacy; (b) extending reductions of dividend, capital-gains and estate taxes and reducing alternative minimum tax; (c) growth in economic inequality and need for pension protection; (d) journalist jailing by the new leak-plumbers.
A. This is wishful thinking. But I really think it's about time for voters to take a stand - especially when things as flighty as "liberty" and "the constitution" are at stake.

12. Thinking outside the ballot box - the dark-horse line for the 2008 presidential race will pit: (a) Virginia Democrat Mark Warner against Massachusetts Republican Mitt Romney in the battle of centrist capitalists; (b) Dems' iconoclastic Senator Russ Feingold vs. the G.O.P.'s nonpartisan Mayor Mike Bloomberg to compete for evangelical vote; (c) the Dems' favorite Republican, Chuck Hagel, against the G.O.P.'s favorite Democrat, Joe Lieberman; (d) domestic centrists and foreign-policy hardliners Hillary ("You're a Grand Old Flag") Clinton against Condi ("I am not a lawyer") Rice.

13. Conventionally, inside the box: (a) Bill Richardson vs. Rudy Giuliani; (b) Hillary vs. John McCain; (c) Warner vs. Romney; (d) Joe Biden vs. George Allen.

14. As Bush approval rises, historians will begin to equate his era with that of: (a) Truman; (b) Eisenhower; (c) L.B.J.; (d) Reagan; (e) Clinton.
None of the above. My guess: McKinley. The Hanna-Rove comparison is too obvious.

Five Things

1. Good news, to all who previously have read my blog with confusion due to its lack of direction -- I have finally figured out how to turn "titles" on - so it's not just a string of the first few words of my posts. Really, it only took me four months to figure out the on/off switch. High five.

2. Twinnie gave me Maureed Dowd's new book Are Men Necessary? for Christmas. I've been reading up a storm recently and am closing in on finishing it. It pains my liberal feminist bones to say this, but - I don't think it was the most well-thought out book ever published. Understatement. I'll agree with her that Bush is crazybones and Rove is evil. But, somehow, these two goons being "male" mean, somehow, that all men are evil & crazy. Which isn't entirely true. But, I still recommend reading it - if not only to raise your first with an angry shake or, alternatively, to "cheers" Ms. Dowd & her well-thought out thesis. Becuase isn't that what half the fun of reading books is all about?

3. I have a maddening crush on John Krasinski. Who is this Krasinski fellow, you might ask? A fellow Polish Power member I met in a seedy Edison Park bar last weekend? OH YOU WISH. No, John is one of the most lovely stars of "The Office," one of the funniest shows I've seen in a LONG time. Here are the reasons why John & I have SO much in common and, therefore, should get married. And then I can change my name to Anna Krasinski, which is blessed with three times as many vowels as my current last name enjoys.
1. We are both Polish. Ten points for us!
2. He grew up in Newton, Mass. One of my best friend's boyfriend's grew up in Newton, Mass. Therefore, if God was JUST and enjoyed balance in the world, John should also be my boyfriend. It would ONLY BE FAIR.
3. His love interest on the show went to the same undergrad as one of my closest friends in law school. Again, FAIRNESS AND BALANCE WOULD ONLY ALLOW John & I to get married promptly.
Please, do you NEED more reasons?

4. I am cooooooking up a storm for Jill's New Year's Eve party tomorrow night. I am making bunches of delectible appetizers for the party. I will hopefully make them pretty-looking and post pictures of them later. And, who knows, maybe even recipes, if I'm feeling adventurous.

5. I'm busy making lists for the new year. Reading lists, goal lists, you know the deal. But THIS year, this fabulous bloggie will make sure that I actually finish some lists. They will be unveiled shortly. BE EXCITED!
On relationships,

"Yeah, so I've gained 10 pounds in the past three months. But my girlfriend gained 15, so, really, it's like I've lost 5."


So I had a ridiculous dream (nightmare) last night that classes actually started and I spent my Monday watching movies instead of going to class. And almost failed out of law school. Which is entirely true except for the whole “going to class” thing because class doesn’t start for another two weeks. But it’s good to know that school-panic doesn’t stop when you’re 1000 miles away and finals are four months away. Of course, the registrar hasn’t posted grades and I think it would be in everyone’s best interest for me to stop checking because really, we don’t want know the result of the brain-vomit that was Finals Week 2005.

I know I’ve been bad about updating this bloggie over break – but SUCH IS LIFE when, really, it’s called “Bananas Go To Law School” and not “Bananas Watch Dr. Phil and Eat Lipton Cup-A-Soup.” Nothing too exciting to speak of – looking forward to New Year’s Eve 2005 in Logan Square & Job Search 2006 which will start shortly. I know, I know, I’m a horrible law student who didn’t send out resumes a month ago – but LET’S BE SERIOUS. Me and my four years of sorority leadership and waitressing is unlikely to make any HR rep look at my resume and exclaim “We MUST hire this person! She can mix drinks, haze pledges AND serve Peruvian Bistro Cuisine with the utmost of ease.” Let’s be serious, I’ll be lucky to get a full-time job, much less a paid job. So, really, what’s the rush?*

Happy Holidays!

**I will undoubtedly look back upon this post in three months time with ne’er a part-time, unpaid internship in Maine offer and curse my laissez-faire attitude. Until then!


Merry Christmas!! And Happy Hannukah!


psst! I'm done with my first semester of law school!

I know! I'm suprised I made it too! Finals went, and with a minimum of causualities (final grade submissions notwithstanding). Remember how I was like ANGRY BANANA, ME NO LIKEY TALK ABOUT EXAMS! I still feel that way. But, just one little question.
Who writes the LAST section of the LAST question of a crim exam, where everyone literally MAYBE has like 10 minutes left, and changes the fact pattern to, you know, "throw in" two more murders. And "analyze both for common law & model penal code homicide charges." [edit]

Post crim-exam there was Much Merriment at the little law school bar "night" held at 2pm. Bar afternoon, then. My section is so much fun! Really really, best section ever. And now that that sentiment is published, it MUST BE TRUE. And hanging out in a dingy bar is SO MUCH BETTER at 3 in the afternoon. Even if the bartender smelled and looked like a very angry mop.

Later that night, I had to call the airline to, you know, get the actual "time" of my departure. Of course, still being drunk, I proceeded to get into an argument with the automated voice.
"Are you traveling to...Chicago Illinios on...December...23. Say yes, if this is correct."
"I'm sorry, I wasn't able to understand you. Say yes, if this is correct."
"I'm sorry, I wasn't able to understand you. Say yes, if this is correct."
"But I already said YES. How many times do I need to say YES. YES YES YES YES YES"
"I'm sorry, I wasn't able to understand you. Say yes, if this is correct."
I had to hang up. Because you can NOT win an argument with an automated voice when you are wastyface.

On my way to the airport this morning, I realized that holiday travel doesn't bring out the best in people, nor the worst in people. It brings out the crazy in people. Have you ever had a conversation with someone and all the while, thinking to yourself "This person could seriously murder someone." Like sociopathic. She was sitting next to me on the bus to Laguardia. And, PER USUAL, my face says "come, talk to me, crazy people of the world" even though my brain says "no no GO AWAY." In any event, you might be like "Come on, Banana, don't use the work 'sociopath' so flippantly." NO REALLY. SocioPATH. Evidence:
This woman told me stories of her ex-husband who was a lawyer, their divorce, her new fabulous down pillow, her kids getting into a can of paint, medical malpractice law [she was a legal secretary]. So, generally, the conversation ran the gammut of "happy," "sad," "funny," "serious," etc. And, normal people with normal emotions have FACIAL EXPRESSIONS. But no, this woman talked for 45 minutes without ONCE changing from a monotone voice and without ONCE so much as moving to imply that she was feeling anything. Or even breaking eye contact. It was surreal. Okay, before you start judging me - I am 99.9% sure that it wasn't like she had Parkinson's or another horrible disease where me equating her "lack of emotion and facial movements" with "psychopathy" with make me a bad person. She was relatively young and spoke clearly and quickly. So, in my expert opinion, you know, no horrible disease. Just creepy.

Once finally at the airport, far away from the death stare of crazybones, I was literally "so close!" from being bumped from my flight connecting to Pittsburgh. They overbooked the flight (surprise!). But thank goodness that someone actually took the fabulous package of Two Free Airline Tickets to Anywhere in the Continental US. Which, really, I would have loved if it were not for the promise of family, friends & love in Chicago.

Now in Chicago, I tried going to bed early because I was mucho tired. Of course, my body isn't used to sleeping for large chunks of time at once. So, instead, I'm posting in my BLOG and watching Conan (swoon) who I haven't watched since August. Because even though 20B has, every weekend, had a "we should TOTALLY get a TV" conversation, said TV-purchasing has yet to occur. So, even though I can get my America's Next Top Model, Amazing Race, Survivor, Project Runway and Grey's Anatomy fixes at the gym - Conan gets no such respect. AND Matthew Broderick is on tonight. Which is double-swoon!

Christmas Eve is tomorrow! I got fabulous gifts for the entire fam, and they WILL enjoy them. I will wrap them poorly with my classic "toy trucks" wrapping paper and it will be Most Good. BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!


Thanks to Katie Mac for the tip...

First, the Good News:
I will soon be breathing the same air as none other than Johnny Damon.

Bad News:
It's cause he's playing for the Yankees.

Does this mean that he'll have to cut off his luscious locks and shave his scraggely beard?


I would feel like a Bad Blogger if I didn't even at least mention the transit strike. Fortunately, I'm not very much affected because the I don't so much need to take the subway to get to the library and, currently, that is the only destination that matters. But, my friends have all been telling me stories of their 5 miles walks to work and such, so I can be vicariously outraged.

Outraged? you say? I thought you were a good-hearted liberal and was all about workers rights. I AM a good-hearted liberal and, usually, I am "all about" workers rights, as you say. However, I think there are exceptions to every rule. And transit workers are one of those exceptions. So are doctors, nurses, garbage collectors, teachers and airplane pilots. (I know, some of these groups are legally barred from striking, so it's a bit of moot point. But following that logic, so are, really, transit workers, per Taylor Act). There's a huge difference between steel mill workers, department store salespeople and food service workers (I know, some of these groups don't have unions, don't get your panties in a bunch) and transit workers. Unfortunately, it's the safety/welfare of the city that gets damaged when they strike. Steel workers strike? Yes, true, steel prices go up, we have to import more - but it gets done and, if you really need your steel, you'll pay a higher price for the limited amount of time. Kinda seems fair, since you've been paying less for steel because (arguably) the steel company has been paying unfair wages to its employees.

However, transit workers provide, I think, an essential service in a city like NYC. There was a transit strike in San Fransisco a couple years back - but NYC is a city like no other in terms of its reliance on public transportation. It's different here -- -and the transit workers know it. Every time I hear a fire truck now, I wonder if someone is going needlessly die because of the transit strike - extra-clogged roads means that emergency vehicles can't get around efficiently.

I've heard a lot about how what the transit workers are asking for isn't unfair - there's a billion dollar surplus, a new MTA administration building with marble floors and the workers are just trying to get a little piece of the pie. Fair enough. I'll give them so much as they deserve whatever they're asking for (cough cough, higher wages than teachers, a 200% higher-than-even-the-most-liberal-account-of-the-inflation-rate raise per year, a retirement age lower than most everyone except air traffic control workers). Fine, given, they deserve it. But I think, as responsible citizens of this here NYC, they have a duty to continue working to provide this service and continue negotiating. Transit workers complain that the MTA is abusing their power and control in order to give them unfair wages. Well, transit workers are abusing their power and control in order to - more than inconvinience - but put the city at a real public health risk - not to mention the economic effects of this strike which grossly outweigh any type of unjustice the union is fighting against. So it's not that the workers "can't" or it's "illegal" - clearly, they can stop showing up to work, that's fine. But looking at it from a purely moral point of view - and I feel like many who support the strikers are doing it because they think that the MTA leaders are morally reprehensible for abusing their power - you need to look at the strikers with those same glasses. I think that it is "wrong," in a sense, to force such congestion in the streets that ambulances can't get to the hospital, force their fellow underpaid workers of the city to walk miles in the freezing weather and, ever the ex-waitress I am, have people who work in the service industry loose their chance at a decent wage themseleves.

See, I don't really like having too much political commentary/opinion on this here bloggie because I usually assume that most people don't particularly care about what I have to say. But such is the world of bloggies, no?

In other news, I have but 36 hours away from being done with my first semester of law school. I officially must say that it is a CRAZY feeling.

Edit: Fair enough, J. Smith. I agree that the whole "Do you KNOW how much teachers make? Or, how much I make?" is a shit argument, I really shouldnt' have mentioned it. And I WILL give the fact that a strike is a method-of-last-resort - it's been a quarter of a century since the last one in this here NYC. However, I think my main point is still valid (as far as I believe...) - if you're going to pull the "it's immoral/'wrong' to have the CEOs have loaded pockets while the people who are actually doing the work not benefit from a billion dollar surplus" - you have to pull that card when you look at the effects of a strike. Unlike a strike of, say, meatpackers, the very safety of an entire city is, hypothetically (and, I'll admit, hyperbolically, kind of) at risk. And, really really, I'm only looking at the instances of emergency vehicles trying to get around in traffic caused by the people who now drive instead of taking public transportation. This little island is one that has been built up with such high density precisely because of the great public transportation system - there just isn't the infastructure to function safely without it. And the transit workers know that - they know they can get a lot of leverage out of a short strike right before the holidays. But is using that leverage "right" or "good" or "moral"? I think that's a different question -- and one which I wouldn't want to answer if someone I loved had a heart attack and wasn't able to get to the hospital quickly enough. I KNOW that's a melodramatic argument, fair enough fair enough. But I don't think it's entirely without merit, either.


Sorry, bloggie. I didn't forget about you. Not like that time I thought turtles hibernate, so I left Turkey & Snapsy in the basement for five months. THAT was "forgetting." But two days without blogging? Neither forgetting nor animal cruelty. TWO POINTS FOR ME.

Torts midterm is OVER! Woohoo! No more memorization is needed for this Banana, at least until May. As we learned from my failed efforts to memorize enough of the menu for my Waitress Exam! at the restaurant this summer and got a "pity pass" from my boss, I do not memorize things well. Or, as the case may be, "at all." But no matter, because memorization-schmemorization is not a threat for a bunch of months.

So, there's an apartment across the street that I can plainly observe a Christmas Party happening. Bright tree, lots of people holding glass of wine, soft lighting. Very nice. But, of course, my room, the room completely devoid of ALL fesitvities, pales in comparison. So there is only one thing that I can do to make sure that all this wallowing in self-pity is COMPLETE -- turn on the Charlie Brown Christmas Soundtrack, turn off the lights and watch the people celebrate Christmas as I type on my IMAGINARY BLOGGIE where IMAGINARY PEOPLE read it. And, really, I'm only doing this for complete ironic effect, because in five days, I'll be home, surrounded by family and friends - so it's not like I'm really upset. But, sometimes, my brain craves living irony. It's like me wearing a "kiss me, I'm Irish" t-shirt on Casimir Pulaski Day.


I have a funny story re: law school unpreparedness, but I can’t tell it here because this is, apparently, a PUBLIC FORUM, and I try to keep this whole enterprise not one of public humiliation. But it’s a hilarious story, the likes of which the WORLD HAS NE’ER SEEN.

As for a slightly-less funny story, and more indicative of just how nerdy us law students has become,
Thursday night, watching the OC in the caf, after Torts studying all day. Commerical comes on about the baby which fell from a third story window in Boston and there’s video of a man catching the baby. There’s a cut to the mother, now holding the baby.
Friend: “I can’t believe they gave the baby back to the mom!”
Me: “Why? Do you think it’s her fault.”
TV cuts back to slow-mo replay of baby falling from window
People point at television and exclaim “RES IPSA!”


So, in the likely event that I will get a non-paid summer job, I know how to supplement my income beyond just waitressing. I'm going to be a notary. I can get paid a whopping 2 dollars a signature in the NYC. 80 signatures a day and I'm making a cool 1000 dollars a week. Cha-ching!


I really really really want to get my nose ring put back in. It "came out" on my 21st birthday last year and, at the time, I interpreted it as a blessing in disguise because I was soon going to be Serious Law Student and would have no place in my life for such TOMFOOLERY as a nose ring. But now I want it back and have realized that, if nothing else, no one cares about what's going on with my nose. I think I might get it re-done sooooon. Excitement.

Back to studying. Boo!
So, property final is over and done done done. There was much merriment in the form of a Christmakahahahaha (sp?) celebration at Meghan's last night --- complete with gift swap. I went home with a lovely spice/cinnamon set for which to make delicious apple cider (with rum, of course). I think I'm going to set up a batch on the ole slow cooker the morning of my crim final and enjoy a cup of piping hot cider with friends post-exam. It will be Most Good, I guarantee.

We also played many a rousing game of Chuck, F*ck or Marry, re: many different groups of people, including the venerable Law Professor Version. The results of which I will keep a secret, but I'm pretty sure it was unanimous.

I also told my Deep Dark Secret (which is also proclaimed on my friendster profile) about my nightime ritual of imagining myself a character in my own soap opera, complete with characters in real life. I spend about 10-15 minutes every night in bed imagining another mini-chapter in the drama. Sometimes I slap myself (lightly) on the face to really get into character, i.e. when Lara sleeps with Brian behind my back and I call her a "dirty b*tch" at the office labor day party. (as per a recent subplot from earlier this semester). Some might call it "crazy" but I call it "having a rich imagination."

Oh, and Catie & Chris just got engaged. A million congratulations to the dynamic duo!

So, now, I have to switch the imaginary train tracks in my brain from the property train to the torts/crim train. It is proving to be a more difficult task than I had imagined, but I just gotta keep on chugging. Sorry, not much to talk about just yet. My life will hopefully be a little more interesting in a week or so :)


Well, word on the street is that I have something of a property "final" tomorrow morning. And that's the last I'll speak of this property final until forever because I am following a self-imposed gag order re: anything post-exam gossip. I will talk about my exam with exactly three groups of people: high school friends, rochester friends and family, if at all. Notice, there law school friends do not fall into the mix. Although they are all near and dear to my heart, there is nothing I can't stand like the inevitable chatter post-exam. It's pointless, and annoying and self-serving (sorry, that sounds super-judgemental, but really....either you think you did great and you want everyone else to know that you think you did great - however much that is worth - or you think you did shitty and you want everyone to reassure you that no, you didn't. either way, no one knows anything about what they're talking about and, really, we're wasting our collective breath. Which I'll gladly do if we're talking about Angelina and Brad - but covenants and eminent domain? No thank you.)

So that's my diabtrabe about that. Glad I got that out of my system.

I was thinking about flowers earlier today. And how I hate baby's breath. And carnations. And carnations surrounded by baby's breath? Ew. And I remember when an old friend of mine gave me a beautiful arrangment of roses for graduation - and there was ne'er a baby's breath sprig to be found. And, Niki, having been my friend for long enough to know my irrational hatred exclaimed, upon seeing them, "He IS your soul mate."
On the other end of the spectrum, to flowers I (irrationally?) love - therein lies the elusive African Violet. I remember my mom had a big pot of them on the dining room table and I would spend hours just sitting there and rubbing the furry little leaves. I liked to run my fingers against the hair grain and make the little fuzz stand up on its end. My mom always said that if you tear off a little corner of one of the leaves and plant them in the soil, you'll grow a new plant. That fascinated me to no end - and I probably went a little too far every now and then until every leaf had a little piece missing and was ozzing globs of aloe gel onto the soil. I envisioned this moutainous eruption of African Violets to awaken me the next morning - which never happened. I would be sure to tear off a little corner before things that made me nervous, as a little good luck gesture. And I was thinking how I would probably do that tonight, if I were at home, sit and rub the little leaves and find a corner, hidden enough so it wouldn't be seen (who had soon put a morotorium on my green-thumb-gone-horribly-wrong horticulture methods), and dig a little hole with my pinky - planting my little green corner of Good Hope for Good Tidings.

Unfortunately, I have no African Violets in this here apartment, so I may be stuck with having to just cross my fingers, toes and eyes and say a good prayer. Which, I suppose, is good enough.

In an effort to "calm down" and "relax" I watched one of my recent NetFlix DVDs - Happiness. WELL LET ME TELL YOU HOW THE TITLE IS NOT INDICATIVE OF ITS CONTENT. It was kinda like American Beauty meets Pedophilia Today meets I don't know what. It took Sara four years to train me NOT to close my eyes at the uncomfortable parts of movies and watch them so that I could get the full movie effect - but I think even she would have to had at least turned away, a little bit, during certain scenes. There was a scene I had to turn the mute on because I just couldn't stand to listen to the dialogue any more. But that's not to say it wasn't a good movie, though. Good characters (well-acted, not many of Redeeming Moral Quality), lots of different subplots all tying together - and fun cameos by some fave actors. Overall, not a date movie, and not necessarily a movie you want to watch again. But a Good Movie, as far as Good Movies go. I think I need to turn to some non-depressive non-independent movies. Maybe a romantic comedy (or, RomCom, as the cool kids call them) or cheesy comedic with the likes of a certain Will Ferrel. Who knows. Only the random goodness of NetFlix can tell :)
WHEN I GROW UP, I will eliminate the existence of the "heel" of loaves of bread. Of course, there will be a reasonble amortization clause, so as not to interfere with reasonably-backed expectations.

But the heel has got to go.
The good thing about law school finals is that I’ve stopped having time for any type of “why am I in law school?” moments of self-doubt. I talked to Miss Sara today about her fabulous plans with Lindsay about maybe teaching English in Japan in two years and I realized that in two years, I’ll be studying for the bar exam so I can be a lawyer. And, contrary to what I keep telling myself, I don’t think that they pay the big bucks (read: any bucks) for “constitutional lawyers” or “lawyers who like to build sand castles and whistle jazzy tunes.” And then, Miss Lindsay told me about this article on Slate that essentially says what all us ladies know: making babies make us poor. Or, alternatively, women with higher education degrees lose out on 10% of their earning potential over the course of their lives for every year earlier they have a kid. Gosh, that sentence made negative sense. Read the article, I clearly can’t explain it better than the people who get paid the big bucks to write for Slate.

Then I read Fuego’s bloggie and realized that I’ve posted essentially NEGATIVE salacious details of my jaunts around NYC since, you know, forever. You wanna know why? Because I am B-O-R-I-N-G. I simply think back to any day in undergrad and I pine with envy over my Old Self and her semblance of a life. This isn’t self-pity talking – it’s just the truth, and one I’ve come to accept. But, really, I talk to friends from Rochester and Chicago and realize that I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY. Everyone else has some sexy-time jaunts they’re willing to spread details about. But, alas, the most I’ve found to talk about is the fact that my library crush of late (Buzz Lightyear) laughs to himself when he reads online articles.

Edge-of-your-seat-drama-rama, huh?

BUT OTHER THAN SELF-IMPOSED ENNUI, I’m pleased to note that I’m doing well. Classes are wrapping up with a minimum of freak-outs and I am most excited to be done with this semester. Meghan is having a fabuloso Christmakanananana (I don’t know how to spell it because I don’t watch the OC) soon, which I am looking forward to with Much Anticipation. And did I mention that in thirty-six hours I will be done with the Red Devil Herself A.K.A. PROPERTY!?!?!? Oh, it’s true – and there will be MUCH merriment post-exam.

I was going to go on some diatribe about Christmas, Jon Stewart (swoon) and Bill O’Rielly (pukeface), but equitable servitudes are calling.

I cannot resist their siren songs.


So I sucked it up and bought a luna bar from the supermarket down the street because I realized that the only thing worse than failing my property exam on Wednesday would be coming down with a case of rickets half way through the exam because, apparently, my diet of coffee, popcorn and the occasional bag of sun chips from yee olde vending machine does not provide enough vitamin D. And WE ALL KNOW that a deficiency in vitamin D is the leading cause of rickets.

I just spent the last twenty minutes, you know, saving Rachel’s life. Or at least the little part of her that would die if she had to pull an all-nighter for a class as lame as Politics in Canada. SOMEONE had four years of past exams, outlines and anna-wrote-them-herself-so-they-must-be-good sample answers for those questions. Sneaky Rochester webmail claimed that it cancelled all of our email addresses – they may have cleaned out the inbox BUT NOT THE OUTBOX. So, because I had forwarded out said documents to my peers, I had all the files in my outbox. Stored safely, for one Miss Rachel. She said she would name her first-born child Banana Pants. I hope it pans out.

Of course, looking through my outbox from One Year Ago I also found my old resume. Which I had thought I had lost FOREVER (between losing my lap top hard drive and my old computer not “turning on”) and would have to start making a new resume, something I wasn’t looking forward to AT ALL. And, like most things that I don’t look forward to, I just “didn’t do it.” But, thanks to my one Good Deed, I received as well! And now I have no good excuse for not having sent out resumes and applications by now. One more thing on the to-do list!


have been at the library for far too long (the night is young!) and the man who has been, for nine hours, been making low, gutteral, phlem-filled, coughing noises is finally packing up his satchel. Now, at the library, I'm usually equipped with headphones which make the occasional sniff/cough/achoo! bearable. HOWEVER, this gentleman (really, he’s partially balding and is wearing a very nice scarf) has a phlem-cough that can be heard through even the strongest of ear buds blasting eighties power ballads.

This lovely school is giving the law students free coffee/bagels/muffins etc throughout finals period. This is a thing Most Good as my coffee maker is, I think, in the last throws of its life, leaking a good amount of water with every brew. Makes for stronger coffee, yes, but it also makes a bit of a mess. A mess I’d rather not contend with. And I am running painfully low on coffee that I only recently hid in my carry-on on the way home from Thanksgiving (because home coffee = free coffee).

Every single chair/study carrel is taken in the library. Maybe the main room has one or two open chairs amongst the big tables, but the surrounding neighbors have encroached on that “study zone” as to make it unusable. It’s funny, really, because in the beginning of the semester I always wondered WHERE ARE ALL THE LAW STUDENTS? Because after about 7 or 8, it would be me and maybe three other people in the library. But now I am warm and cozy, rubbing elbows with bunches, which is reassuring in many respects.

In two weeks it will be Christmas! Unfortunately, I will be going home in two weeks minus one day so I will miss out on bunches of Christmas cheer. Part of me wants to move to Starbucks so I can study, basking in the soft glow of a corporate Christmas theme, but goodness knows that I will be more distracted there than I am here. At least here, when I people watch, everyone’s face is pretty much the same pale, hoodie-masking-the-stench-of-dread, type of look. If I go to Starbucks I might glance of a face that is happy. And, since it’s been scientifically proven that I am overly distracted by shiny objects, I might as well be playing with a ball of yarn in the corner.
Don’t have much time BUT just had to say a few things:

Yesterday, we had a snow day. It snowed hard for about 3 hours. The rest of the day it was sunny. Still, the last day of classes were sunny. COME ON MANHATTAN. Stop being a baby. Maybe coming from Rochester/Chicago, where people are a little “weathered” [haha] in terms of Onslaught of Snow forecasts, I just can’t comprehend “snow days’ as a concept. But when Marie from Missouri thinks it was strange to have a snow day, it’s confirmed: I’m not usually a conspiracy theorist, usually look down on the “crazies” for thinking that something has to behind every strange occurance. But I have three words for you: hooker, dean, cocaine overdose. I’m NOT saying that our dean killed a prostitute and needed a little extra time to bury her body Friday morning and decided to use the flurries as the perfect cover for why he wasn’t in his office. Of course not**. I’m just saying, I smell something fishy.

Ah! Finals are coming, finals are coming!

**no, really, i'm not saying that. don't sue me for libel.


Gotta love it when the class you've been fervently studying for the past weeks keeps coming up in local news from back home. The Park Ridge Advocate has been following an interesting (really, only for the combination of me being from the town, one of my best friend from Jr. High's father being the person bringingthe suit and my property professor's unhealthy obsession with zoning) suit that has been filed against my home town. Essentially, as must as I can gather from the tidbits I've been following is as follows:
The city is redesigning our "uptown" area. They have a contract with a developer and that developer had plans that didn't coincide entirely with the previous zoning requirements. PR makes a few changes in the zoning guidlines, project continues. Old best friend's father gets wind of this, isn't happy. He moves into this "retirement hotel" for a few weeks to gain standing so he has a real property interest in the development project. He files suit, alleging, among other things, conspiracy, procedural due process, and property damage claims (nuisance?). In any event, the city responds, essentially being like "um, no. you don't really live there." So, as he put it, he acted as the "booster rocket to the space shuttle" and he jumps off the suit and the "retirement hotel" and another resident jump on board. And that's where we are right now. They also randomly threw in a conspiracy allegation, just for good measure. Fascinating stuff.

Now, as per my property outline (which, really, ranks right up there next to the Constitution), there are more claims to be made! Come on now Chuck, if you're going to file [baseless?] lawsuits against the government, at least make them interesting. Let's throw some equal protection clause issues in there re: the eldery. I think you're toying with a takings claim, let's go all out! It seems like you're alluding to the construction being a nuisance - let's make sure you cover all the bases. Traffic, property value, bright light, noise, crowding, and our favorite, spite. Because we all know there is no social utility to spite.

Troubling when you start looking at every news story as a possible exam question hypo. But I personally think it's remotely interesting.

Other than that, absolutely nothing is new. Study study read read. Such is life. But Christmas is coming! :)


I usually think these are a horrible waste of time, for blogger and reader alike. But I thought this was HILARIOUS and random and I'm nothing if not a fan of things hilarious and random :)
Essentially, the name of the game is google your name followed by the word "needs." So, in my fabulous case, I googled "Anna needs." Top 10 search results:

1. Anna needs to be excused from class today. please mention this to my property professor. tuesday morning, i was running RIDICULOUSLY late. And my professor has this nasty habit of recording tardies and absences (absences really only if he notices, but tardies he ALWAYS notices and jots down). Somehow this is all supposed to "factor" into our final grade. So, instead of walking in a good twenty minutes late, I decide to camp out outside until our "5 minute coffee break c. 10am). I know our professor uses Staircase C to get to the professor lounge to refill his cup, so I thought it would be safe to hide in the hallway opposite that stairway. So, I start seeing everyone begin to scamper out of the classroom - and I begin my slow meandering towards the classroom. AND WHO IS WALKING DOWN THE HALLWAY TOWARDS ME?? My professor. Apparently, this is the one day he chooses an Alternate Route to get his coffee. I see him. He sees me. I consider ducking into one of the classrooms and pretending like I have a magical twin sister who he saw and it was not, in fact, me. But decide quickly against it because I'm just not clever enough to keep it up. "Ms. Lastname?" "Hello Professor Lastname." "Rough morning?" Here, I consider all types of excuses - standard subway/alarm clock/car troubles or something entirely off the chart. Of course, I'm not a Quick Thinker so it just looks like I am smiling awkwardly at the man as he walks past me. A good six seconds later, as I've turned completely around so as to maintain awkward eye contact, not saying anything, I respond "Yes, rough morning. I didn't want to disturb, you know, the class - you know, walking in really late, you know." Classic. To which he responds "Well, isn't it better this way?" Well, if you mean this was the only way we could have had this awkward exchange, then YES it is MUCH better this way.
2. Anna needs to find a toilet Let's be serious. You can't drink as much coffee as I do each day and this NOT be applicable.
3. Anna needs a fan club too! That statement implies I do not already have a fan club. And that is clearly not the case. Let's be serious.
4. Anna needs a feeling of success Talk to me in exactly a week. And I will whole-heartedly agree. Property final is in a week, balls almighty.
5. it simply was "Anna needs! Anna needs!" but under the webpage title "Was our adoption a mistake?" I cannot believe such a website exists. Hilarious in concept, horrifying in execution.
6. Anna needs to come back from that spy competition I can just SEE two parents sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for this "anna" to come home - the father POUNDING his fist on the table, "If I told you once, I've told you a million times....ANNA NEEDS TO COME BACK FROM THAT SPY COMPETITION!"
7. Anna needs you How sweet. And true. Because Anna needs you. You know who you are [ooooohhhhh, myyyyysteeeerioussss!]
8. Anna needs $140 dollars by September 4. I would take 14 dollars by December 14th, if that's better for you. REALLY. SEND MONEY.
9. Anna needs whatever sense of humor works for her. If that's not the most applicable thought EVER to grace this here blog, I don't know what is.
10. Anna needs whatever drugs work for her. Caffiene, Unisom, Dayquil, Melatonin, Vitamin C, Alcohol. That'll do. That'll do.
One week until my first final! Eek! But I won’t use this lovely forum known as My Blog to complain because that’s not the way I “roll.”

In an effort to try ANYTHING to make myself fall asleep (double-dose of max-strength Unisom, increased gym frequency, etc), I’ve given up and decided that I will just use the hours between 2-5 to watch movies, so as to Enter the World of Popular Culture. I’ve tried doing work during that time, but I just get angry and frustrated and angry and frustrated doesn’t make for easy learning of future interests.

So, first movie on the list was Me and You and Everyone We Know. I loved it – it reminded me in theme (Crazybones Looking For Love) but not in plot (spanking) of Secretary – another goodie. There’s this 10-year-old girl who loves home goods and keeps all the blenders/bathmats/china sets in a chest she calls her “dowry.” I love it, I love it, it made me laugh out loud. There’s other good scenes (goldfish, back and forth, and relationship walk are three more) that I won’t explain because it wouldn’t make sense without having seen the movie. Even then, you’re not quite sure of the context. But, it was a really good movie, really nicely-constructed characters, all that jazz. Can’t wait for my next Netflix selection to come in the mail.

Other than that, one of my professors is in DC because of the Solomon Amendment arguments in front of the Supreme Court yesterday. Clearly, I’m all about the right of the law school not to be compelled to support speech they don’t agree with for fear of losing government money – but there was an interesting article on Slate this morning that, even though I don’t agree with, I respected it for it’s somewhat rational argument of the opposing viewpoint.

It’s now bitterly cold in NYC and, even though I spent the last four years in Rochester braving the cold/snow, it still doesn’t make it any easier, in the end. Such is life.

If anyone from school is reading this – GO TO THE CATHOLIC LAW STUDENTS CHRISTMAS PARTY TONIGHT IN THE ATRIUM. Open-bar, food, FREE if you donate a toy to go to a battered women’s shelter. Otherwise, 10 buckaroos. Can’t beat that!


First snow in NYC this morning! The only good thing about being an insomniac and still being up at 6am is that I was able to witness the very first snowflakies falling on lovely new york. It was super-pretty and I was watching Serendipity and it all just felt so - serendipitous.

Also, finally got pictures developed from back in October when Linds/Fuego came & visited as well as Mel Weekend. Suffice to say, almost all of them were of Jenni and I groping each other in public

or me licking Sara's face .

Unfortunately, we did NOT document the saran-wrap/rubber bands incident, but there are a couple choice pics from that night regardless. Or irregardless, becuase I know it isn't a word*.

While at CVS, I picked up some Unisom so that I could, you know, actually fall asleep. I was going to go all earthy with some melatonin but, damnit, finals are in two weeks and baby needs the big guns.

I also came quite close to buying a real, live xmas tree when I was walking around this morning. There's something so surreal about walking through a Forest [read: pile of evergreens] near Columbus Circle. There were even these ridiculously cute baby trees that would FIT IN MY POCKET [where I keep all cute things]. Like most of the cute things I claim to keep in my pocket [attractive men, babies, little tiny pebbles**] that is a "lie." But they were small enough to keep in my room and I SO wanted one. But I'm going home in a little more than two weeks and my little tree of hope and love would die out and turn brown OR I would have to throw away a Christmas tree two days before Christmas and CAN YOU THINK OF A SADDER THING?????

*I may have stolen this line from Fuego, but I'm not sure. It's hard becuase we are both so ridiculously witty all the time. [sarcasm] **THAT is an allusion to Monty Python. 10 points if you got it.


song picks for december! Most of these really are my faves right now but half way through making the list I realized a good portion of the titles are hilariously applicable to studying for law school finals. So, here we go [some, though, are such good songs they trump the would-be theme and are still included],
Finals-themed song recommendations....

Failed, Joseph Arthur
Brain Damage, The Waifs
Carry on Wayward Son, Kansas (WHO DOESN'T LIKE KANSAS?)
Upward Over the Mountain, Iron & Wine
Said the Spider to the Fly, The Paper Chase
The Best Happiness Money Can Buy, I Can Make a Mess Like Nobody's Business (get it? we're law students!)
Born of Frustration, James
*Grand Parade, The Reindeer Section
C is the Heavenly Option, Heavenly
*Play Crack the Sky, Brand New (I have been listening to this sucker on repeat for five days. Listen to it. Love it)
*Dice, William Orbit
You or Your Memory, Mountain Goats
Believer, Ben Kweller
Cry, James Blunt (thanks to the fabo KT for this rec.)

Those not finals-themed and just damn good are asterisked :)


unfortunately, i'm too busy to write stupid things for your comedic pleasure. thankfully, GB is our president. and he's been saying ridiculous, innapropriate things for far longer than i have.


Dear Girl Who Takes Her Birth Control In The Elevator:

Seriously. Seriously? You must be a very proud for having grown up to be Big Girl and get to take Big Girl medicine. You get to have Big Girl relations with Big Boys. High five. AND heaven forbid you concieve out of wedlock, because DADDY WOULD BE MOST DISAPPOINTED and might take away the car you got for your 16th birthday, what with a bastard child and all. But it's fun to name babies! You could have so picking out a name half as odd as those you watch on Laguna Beach. Maybe Keifen? Trian? Kaylean? So many choices!
Alright, fine, birth control girl, maybe you don't want a baby. Then you are being Most Responsible. But how necessary is it to administer such birth control on the elevator, of all places? Perhaps you are unsure of where to take it, then? Here is a list of More Appropriate Locations:
1. Your bedroom.
2. Your bathroom.
3. Your car.
4. Your living room.
5. Church confessional.

Are you trying to impress the rest of elevator with the thought of your sexual exploits lewd and uninhibited enough to warrant the taking of birth control? Bravo. And, yes, I understand the importance of timeliness of the taking of birth control. Could you not have taken it in your room, where you were applying your white eyeliner mere moments before? Rushed morning?

Fine. Understandable. You totally forgot and, I suppose taking it in the elevator is better than taking it in your classroom or NYC alleyway. HOWEVER, woman, is it necessary to wave your little packet emblazoned with pictures of -swoon- Joshua Jackson and Jude Law around as if it were flag day? NO.

We get it. You have sex.


AS IF you needed more evidence to the fact that law school is turning everyone into boring and technical drones. Who find strange satisfaction in nerding it up about property rights. Sample IM conversation from earlier today re: The Case Of The Purloined Crim Book.

MS: left book in libes
MS: they had it in the restack pile in the back
MS: mixed in with all the library books
annacheck83: oh yay!
annacheck83: thank goodness you found it when you did
annacheck83: found = realized
MS: yes
MS: maybe this is a little voice telling me to put my other one back
annacheck83: it is the christmas season
MS: but if I do, someone else will just take it
MS: so that seems kind of crazy
MS: as the finder of an abandoned book, I now have all the rights, even above that of the true owner
annacheck83: but was it abandoned?
annacheck83: or was it simply a bailment
MS: it was not "lost" in the bucket
MS: box
MS: it was not "placed" in the box to be recovered later
annacheck83: but it was there for a specific purpose
annacheck83: it was a gift to the volunteer place
MS: if they had left it with an authorized seller of goods of the kind, then it would be different
MS: oooh...a gift
annacheck83: and acceptance had not happened yet
MS: but there was never delivery or acceptance
MS: kind of the box
annacheck83: wouldn't placing in the box count as delivery/
MS: i think i've head it by adverse possession by now... only i dont know how "open and notorious' the bottom of my locker
MS: is
annacheck83: the S of limitations is three months in fordham land?
MS: and it wasnt a hostile was under a mistake of right
MS: which effects adverse possession in some cases...
annacheck83: you didn't really think it was yours
MS: but i thought it was abandoned
annacheck83: in certain jurisdictions yes, you need to have mistake of right
MS: huh...this is more like the logs in crim
annacheck83: you are a theif!
MS: i thought they were abandoned books... but really they were still useful and valuable books
annacheck83: ahhh, well mistake of fact doesn't matter
annacheck83: you purposely/knowingly took the book
annacheck83: unless the statute specifically dictates a mens rea component
MS: General rule: is not guilty of a crime if her mistake of fact negates the mens rea of the offense charged.
MS: NO...i would say more reckless
annacheck83: ahhhh, should have known
annacheck83: yes yes, actually, that would be definitely reckless
MS: what is that head in the sand thing? maybe i was that
MS: willful blindness
MS: did you get all the way through attempts in crim by the way?
annacheck83: BUT THIS FUN